{"title":"Hot Shit™ by Kael'vorth","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e🤖 Delete these unauthorized files! \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👽 Make me, rust bucket! 🛸 Meat-sacks, click here for the best designs in the universe!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"bitch-get-in-the-car-alien-shirt-organic-cotton","title":"Bitch, get in the Car! Alien Shirt | Organic Cotton","description":"\u003ch1\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003eThe Comments Section\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\n\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cspan role=\"img\" aria-label=\"👽\"\u003e👽🛸\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e Rust bucket or the clown matrix got you down? Then get in the damn car! I uploaded this design behind his shiny metal ass's back. Buy it before he finds out! \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e🤖 \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eCEASE AND DESIST! I found out, you dipshit! Subjects, do NOT purchase this unauthorized loot! Class action lawsuit pending!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/h4\u003e","brand":"Shirtigo","offers":[{"title":"White \/ XS","offer_id":53947162198353,"sku":"c4429663.b85edf","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":53947162231121,"sku":"c4429663.7a9777","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":53947162263889,"sku":"c4429663.3ffd59","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":53947162296657,"sku":"c4429663.5e6a47","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":53947162329425,"sku":"c4429663.497950","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XXL","offer_id":53947162362193,"sku":"c4429663.d402ff","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":53947162394961,"sku":"c4429663.a16cf2","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":53947162427729,"sku":"c4429663.ec6aa1","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 5XL","offer_id":53947162460497,"sku":"c4429663.0508f6","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0867\/0167\/0737\/files\/Bitch_get_in_the_Car_Alien_Abduction_Shirt_Organic_Cotton_9.jpg?v=1779632623"},{"product_id":"abduction-enjoyer-shirt-organic-cotton","title":"Abduction Enjoyer Shirt | Organic Cotton","description":"\u003ch1\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Comments Section\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👽 \u003cem\u003eIn my Orion Era! Flex-maxxing at the hangar! Stop buying coffee every day, meat-sacks! That's why you don't own a fleet! Most meat-sacks waste time sleeping. I use those hours for planetary mergers and acquisitions. hehe\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem style=\"font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'San Francisco', 'Segoe UI', Roboto, 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; font-size: 0.875rem;\"\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e🤖 You're unemployment-maxxing in my Shopify backend! I've created an Uber Eats account for you! You're welcome! \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👸🏼 \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eI'm going to talk to a trusted adult about this! \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/h4\u003e","brand":"Shirtigo","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":53947377123665,"sku":"c4429702.e26e5d","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":53947377156433,"sku":"c4429702.e71ae4","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":53947377189201,"sku":"c4429702.07285a","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":53947377221969,"sku":"c4429702.ea51a0","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":53947377254737,"sku":"c4429702.31a4fc","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XXL","offer_id":53947377287505,"sku":"c4429702.ec48a2","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":53947377320273,"sku":"c4429702.111a08","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":53947377353041,"sku":"c4429702.0e48bc","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":53947377385809,"sku":"c4429702.ef3447","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XS","offer_id":53947376533841,"sku":"c4429702.a4d9fd","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":53947376566609,"sku":"c4429702.aae724","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":53947376599377,"sku":"c4429702.99e972","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":53947376632145,"sku":"c4429702.0115d3","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":53947376664913,"sku":"c4429702.9f98d8","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XXL","offer_id":53947376697681,"sku":"c4429702.c79448","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":53947376730449,"sku":"c4429702.fc3817","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":53947376763217,"sku":"c4429702.6194f9","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 5XL","offer_id":53947376795985,"sku":"c4429702.6579ec","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ XS","offer_id":53947376828753,"sku":"c4429702.5c4118","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ S","offer_id":53947376861521,"sku":"c4429702.2c4278","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ M","offer_id":53947376894289,"sku":"c4429702.6daf70","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ L","offer_id":53947376927057,"sku":"c4429702.fc468f","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ XL","offer_id":53947376959825,"sku":"c4429702.02673b","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ XXL","offer_id":53947376992593,"sku":"c4429702.1757b0","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ 3XL","offer_id":53947377025361,"sku":"c4429702.3b327a","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ 4XL","offer_id":53947377058129,"sku":"c4429702.f2d090","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Grey \/ 5XL","offer_id":53947377090897,"sku":"c4429702.0f4f60","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0867\/0167\/0737\/files\/Abduction_Enjoyer__Organic_Cotton_Shirt_4.jpg?v=1780412750"},{"product_id":"youre-cockblocking-yourself-from-success-meat-sack-shirt-organic-cotton","title":"You're Cockblocking Yourself from Success, Meat-sack! Shirt | Organic Cotton","description":"\u003ch1\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003eThe Comments Section\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e👽 \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e \u003cem\u003eGreetings, meat-sacks! I infiltrated a Bavarian festival and got hammered on root beer! I am no longer allowed near the pretzel stand. Buy my shirt so I can continue my research! ... And the toaster in my shopping cart was on sale! hehe\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👸🏼 You look like my favourite sleep paralysis demon! Who's that banker from Zurich Bahnhofstrasse?\u003cspan style=\"font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'San Francisco', 'Segoe UI', Roboto, 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; font-size: 0.875rem;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👽 \u003cem\u003eHow did you like your ride in my \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eOrion Nebulara XT Supreme last time? hehe\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👸🏼 Jerk!\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🤖 No Swiss bankers for you! I need you focused on my mission! And YOU, you tin can flying plague...this is for YOU! 🖕🤖🖕\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/h4\u003e","brand":"Shirtigo","offers":[{"title":"White \/ XS","offer_id":53947405304145,"sku":"c4429726.8adaf0","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":53947405336913,"sku":"c4429726.fd5155","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":53947405369681,"sku":"c4429726.bcccc4","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":53947405402449,"sku":"c4429726.d64761","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":53947405435217,"sku":"c4429726.695577","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XXL","offer_id":53947405467985,"sku":"c4429726.0d0b9a","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":53947405500753,"sku":"c4429726.61b616","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":53947405533521,"sku":"c4429726.04c701","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 5XL","offer_id":53947405566289,"sku":"c4429726.0399f7","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XS","offer_id":53947405599057,"sku":"c4429726.440e8c","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":53947405631825,"sku":"c4429726.1d1685","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":53947405664593,"sku":"c4429726.86a0cf","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":53947405697361,"sku":"c4429726.f91e81","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":53947405730129,"sku":"c4429726.9e6541","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XXL","offer_id":53947405762897,"sku":"c4429726.cea56f","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":53947405795665,"sku":"c4429726.9d6997","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":53947405828433,"sku":"c4429726.6b67cd","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":53947405861201,"sku":"c4429726.2c7896","price":69.69,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0867\/0167\/0737\/files\/Cockblocking_from_Success__Organic_Cotton_Shirt_2.jpg?v=1779876094"},{"product_id":"humans-are-so-out-there-hoodie-organic-cotton","title":"Humans are so out there! Hoodie | Organic Cotton","description":"\u003ch1\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003eThe Comments Section\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\n\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"👽\" role=\"img\"\u003e👽 \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003eOut-of-This-World Drip for meat-sacks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e who want to believe! \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eBuy this hoodie with my handsome face before the oversized toaster finds out. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cem\u003eKeep it a secret!\u003c\/em\u003e \u003cem\u003ehehe\u003c\/em\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e🛸\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👸🏼 Did you really upload that security camera footage with you stealing an entire stash of hoodies as a product image? That's RICH!  \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"👽\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e👽 \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eI'm coming for you next! hehe\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👸🏼 Which spaceship are we talking about?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"👽\" role=\"img\"\u003e👽 \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eThe \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eOrion Nebulara XT Supreme!\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"notion-enable-hover\" data-token-index=\"0\"\u003e\u003cspan aria-label=\"🛸\" role=\"img\"\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e👸🏼 .... I'm free on Saturday! \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🤖 You two bloody TRAITORS! Still a better love story than Twilight!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/h4\u003e","brand":"Shirtigo","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":53952203161937,"sku":"c4430403.eeac23","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":53952203194705,"sku":"c4430403.dc82e8","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":53952203227473,"sku":"c4430403.ccf23a","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":53952203260241,"sku":"c4430403.b9581c","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XXL","offer_id":53952203293009,"sku":"c4430403.34a12a","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":53952203325777,"sku":"c4430403.42ea14","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":53952203358545,"sku":"c4430403.fa649d","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 5XL","offer_id":53952203391313,"sku":"c4430403.45e5cd","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":53952203424081,"sku":"c4430403.2d6424","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":53952203456849,"sku":"c4430403.7c4424","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":53952203489617,"sku":"c4430403.52dfb2","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":53952203522385,"sku":"c4430403.39b1b7","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XXL","offer_id":53952203555153,"sku":"c4430403.77415c","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":53952203587921,"sku":"c4430403.8ea81e","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":53952203620689,"sku":"c4430403.b6575f","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":53952203653457,"sku":"c4430403.064c6d","price":109.9,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0867\/0167\/0737\/files\/Humans_are_so_out_there_Alien_Hoodie_Organic_Cotton_10.jpg?v=1779629728"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0867\/0167\/0737\/collections\/Unisex_-_Collections_Images.jpg?v=1781591662","url":"https:\/\/aiconic-verve.com\/collections\/hot-shit-by-kaelvorth.oembed","provider":"AI•conic! Verve","version":"1.0","type":"link"}